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Wha's
like us poem
John Logie Baird,
television pioneer.
Even
before the Industrial Revolution, Scots have been at the forefront of
innovation and discovery across a wide range of spheres: the steam engine,
the bicycle, tarmacadum roads, the telephone, television, the transistor,
the motion picture, penicillin, electromagnetics, radar, insulin and
calculus are only a few of the most significant products of Scottish
ingenuity.
Road
Transport Innovations
A
gas powered items (gas mask) : James Gregory (1638-1675)
A
steam car (steam engine): William Murdoch (1754-1839)
Macadam
roads: John Loudon Macadam (1756-1836)
Driving
on the left: Determined by a Scottish-inspired Act of Parliament in 1772
The
pedal bicycle: Kirkpatrick Macmillan (1813-1878)
The
pneumatic tyre: Robert William Thomson and John Boyd Dunlop
(1822-1873)
The
overhead valve engine: David Dunbar Buick (1854-1929)
The
speedometer: Sir Keith Elphinstone (1864-1944)
The
motor lorry: John Yule in 1870
The
steam tricycle: Andrew Lawson in 1895
Civil Engineering Innovations
Bridges
Bridge
design: Sir William Arrol (1838-1913), Thomas Telford (1757-1834) &
John Rennie (1761-1821)
Suspension
bridge improvements: Sir Samuel Brown (1776-1852)
Tubular
Steel: Sir William Fairbairn (1789-1874)
Canals & Docks
Canal
design: Thomas Telford (1757-1834)
Dock
design: John Rennie (1761-1821)
The
patent slip for docking vessels: Thomas Morton (1781-1832)
Crane
design: James Bremner (1784-1856)
Lighthouses
Lighthouse
design: Robert Stevenson (1772-1850)
The
Drummond Light: Thomas Drummond (1797-1840)
Power Innovations
Condensing
steam engine & improvements: James Watt (1736-1819)
Coal-gas
lighting: William Murdock (1754-1839)
The
Stirling heat engine: Rev. Robert Stirling (1790-1878)
Electro-magnetic
innovations: James Clerk Maxwell (1831-79)
Carbon
brushes for dynamos: George Forbes (1849-1936)
The
Clark cycle gas engine: Sir Dugald Clark (1854-1932)
Wireless
transformer improvements: Sir James Swinburne (1858-1958)
Cloud
chamber recording of atoms: Charles T.R. Wilson (1869-1959)
Wave-powered
electricity generator: Stephen Salter in 1977
Shipbuilding Innovations
The
steamship paddle wheel: Patrick Miller (1731-1815)
The
steam boat: William Symington (1763-1831)
Europe's
first passenger steamboat: Henry Bell (1767-1830)
The
first iron-hulled steamship: Sir William Fairbairn (1789-1874)
The
first practical screw propeller: Robert Wilson (1803-1882)
Marine
engine innovations: James Howden (1832-1913)
Heavy Industry Innovations
The
carronade cannon: Robert Melville (1723-1809)
Making
cast steel from wrought iron: David Mushet (1772-1847)
Wrought
iron sash bars for glass houses: John C. Loudon (1783-1865)
The
hot blast oven: James Beaumont Neilson (1792-1865)
The
steam hammer: James Nasmyth (1808-1890)
Wire
rope: Robert Stirling Newall (1812-1889)
Steam
engine improvements: William McNaught (1831-1881)
The
Fairlie, a narrow gauge, double-bogey railway engine: Robert Francis
Fairlie (1831-1885)
Agricultural Innovations
Threshing
machine improvements: James Meikle (c.1690-c.1780) & Andrew Meikle
(1719-1811)
Hollow
pipe drainage: Sir Hugh Dalrymple, Lord Drummore (1700-1753)
The
Scotch Plough: James Anderson of Hermiston (1739-1808)
Deanstonisation
soil-drainage system: James Smith (1789-1850)
The
mechanical reaping machine: Rev. Patrick Bell (1799-1869)
The
Fresno Scraper: James Porteous (1848-1922)
The
Tuley tree shelter: Graham Tuley in 1979
Communication Innovations
Print
stereotyping: William Ged (1690-1749)
The
balloon post: John Anderson (1726-1796)
The
adhesive postage stamp and the postmark: James Chalmers (1782-1853)
The
post office
The
mail-van service
Universal
Standard Time: Sir Sandford Fleming (1827-1915)
Light
signalling between ships: Admiral Philip H. Colomb (1831-1899)
The
telephone: Alexander Graham Bell (1847-1922)
The
teleprinter: Frederick G. Creed (1871-1957)
The
television: John Logie Baird (1888-1946)
Radar:
Robert Watson-Watt (1892-1973)
Publishing
firsts
The
first book translated from English into a foreign language
The
first edition of the Encyclopedia Britannica (1768-81)
The
first English textbook on surgery (1597)
The
first modern pharmacopoeia, the Materia Medical Catalogue (1776)
The
first textbook on Newtonian science
The
first colour newspaper advertisement
The
first postcards and picture postcards in the UK
Scientific innovations
Logarithms:
John Napier (1550-1617)
Popularizing
the decimal point: John Napier (1550-1617)
The
Gregorian telescope: James Gregory (1638-1675)
The
concept of latent heat: Joseph Black (1728-1799)
The
pyroscope, atmometer and aethrioscope scientific instruments: Sir John
Leslie (1766-1832)
Identifying
the nucleus in living cells: Robert Browen (1773-1858)
Hypnosis:
James Braid (1795-1860)
Colloid
chemistry: Thomas Graham (1805-1869)
The
Kelvin S1 unit of temperature: William Thompson, Lord Kelvin (1824-1907)
Devising
the diagramatic system of representing chemical bonds: Alexander Crum
Brown (1838-1922)
Criminal
fingerprinting: Henry Faulds (1843-1930)
The
noble gases: Sir William Ramsay (1852-1916)
Pioneering
work on nutrition and poverty: John Boyd Orr (1880-1971)
The
ultrasound scanner: Ian Donald (1910-1987)
Ferrocene
synthetic substances: Peter Ludwig Pauson in 1955
The
MRI body scanner: John Mallard in 1980
The
first cloned mammal (Dolly the sheep): The Roslin Institute research
centre in 1996
Medical Innovations
Devising
the cure for scurvy: James Lind (1716-1794)
Discovering
quinine as the cure for malaria: George Cleghorn (1716-1794)
Pioneering
the use of surgical anaesthesia: Sir James Young Simpson (1811-1870)
The
hypodermic syringe: Alexander Wood (1817-1884)
Pioneering
the use of antiseptics: Joseph Lister (1827-1912)
Identifying
the mosquito as the carrier of malaria: Sir Ronald Ross (1857-1932)
Identifying
the cause of brucellosis: Sir David Bruce (1855-1931)
Discovering
the vaccine for typhoid fever: Sir William B. Leishman (1865-1926)
Discovering
insulin: John J.R. MacLeod (1876-1935) with others
Penicillin:
Sir Alexander Fleming (1881-1955)
Discovering an effective turberculosis treatment: Sir John Crofton in the
1950s
Primary
creator of the artificial kidney (Professor Kenneth Lowe - Later Queen's
physician in Scotland)
Developing
the first beta-blocker drugs: Sir James W. Black in 1964
Glasgow
Coma Scale: Graham Teasdale and Bryan J. Jennett (1974)
Household Innovations
The
Dewar Flask: Sir James Dewar (1847-1932)
The
piano with foot pedals: John Broadwood (1732-1812)
The
waterproof macintosh: Charles MacIntosh (1766-1843)
The
kaleidoscope: Sir David Brewster (1781-1868)
The
modern lawnmower: Alexander Shanks (1801-1845)
The
Lucifer friction match: Sir Isaac Holden (1807-1897)
Paraffin:
James Young (1811-1883)
The
fountain pen: Robert Thomson (1822-1873)
Cotton-reel
thread: J & J Clark of Paisley
Lime
Cordial: Lachlan Rose in 1867
Bovril
beef extract: John
Lawson Johnston in 1874
The
life ring, or personal flotation device: Captain Ward in 1854
Weapons
Innovations
The
Ferguson rifle: Patrick Ferguson in 1770 or 1776
The
Lee bolt system as used in the Lee-Metford and Lee-Enfield series rifles:
James Paris Lee
Economist
Adam Smith; Smith was born in 1723, hailing from Kirkcaldy, a Scottish town
north of Edinburgh; the 18th century Scot considered to be the father of
modern economics; Smith's ``An Inquiry into the Nature and Causes of the
Wealth f Nations, which argued that minimal government interference in
commerce would promote human welfare and alleviate poverty, was published
in 1776. He is the first Scotsman to appear on the central bank's currency
in England, replacing Elgar's image in the next few years on as many as 1
billion notes.
Wha's Like Us - Damn Few And
They're A' Deid
written by Tom Anderson Cairns.
The average Englishman, in the home he calls his castle, slips into his
national costume, a shabby raincoat, patented by chemist Charles Macintosh
from Glasgow, Scotland. En route to his office he strides along the
English lane, surfaced by John Macadam of Ayr, Scotland.
He drives an English car fitted with tyres invented by John Boyd Dunlop
of Dreghorn, Scotland, arrives at the station and boards a train, the
forerunner of which was a steam engine, invented by James Watt of
Greenock, Scotland. He then pours himself a cup of coffee from a thermos
flask, the latter invented by Dewar, a Scotsman from Kincardine-on-Forth.
At the office he receives the mail bearing adhesive stamps invented by
James Chalmers of Dundee, Scotland.
During the day he uses the telephone invented by Alexander Graham Bell,
born in Edinburgh, Scotland.
At home in the evening his daughter pedals her bicycle invented by
Kirkpatrick Macmillan, blacksmith of Dumfries, Scotland.
He watches the news on his television, an invention of John Logie Baird of
Helensburgh, Scotland, and hears an item about the U.S. Navy, founded by
John Paul Jones of Kirkbean, Scotland.
He has by now been reminded too much of Scotland and in desperation he
picks up the Bible only to find that the first man mentioned in the good
book is a Scot, King James VI, who authorised its translation.
Nowhere can an Englishman turn to escape the ingenuity of the Scots.
He could take to drink, but
the Scots make the best in the world.
He could take a rifle and end it all but the breech-loading rifle was
invented by Captain Patrick of Pitfours, Scotland.
If he escapes death, he might then find himself on an operating table
injected with penicillin, which was discovered by Alexander Fleming of
Darvel, Scotland, and given an anaesthetic, which was discovered by Sir
James Young Simpson of Bathgate, Scotland.
Out of the anaesthetic, he would find no comfort in learning he was as
safe as the Bank of England founded by William Paterson of Dumfries,
Scotland.
Perhaps his only remaining hope would be to get a transfusion of guid
Scottish blood which would entitle him to ask "Wha’s Like Us".
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